Pippa Middleton, Was Well Dressed Once, Remember?

Here’s an article I stumbled across when reading my news widget. At first, I thought the title was a bit harsh. But then, as I read on, I realised it was right. Pippa probably does dress in the dark.

Pippa Middleton’s Fashion Dense

Oh dear.

By the way – that’s my headline, that one. Thanks. It IS great ūüôā


I Was Lied To, And You’re Crap At Your Job

So last week, Lucy and I met up. The plan was to go to college, meet up, get pierced, coffee, eat, then see what happened. It didn’t go like that AT ALL.

See, I went to college. I caught the bus, we met up. Then I went to Blue Banana, a chain of hipster – come – emo shops. I got my other piercings and all done in either professional shops, or by my own hand, so already I wasnt too keen on going to a clothing retailer, but hey, there was an offer on.

We went in, and I asked if the piercer was in. Indeed she was. Good. Ten pound piercings? Yes. Great.

No, I was recommended to not have a butterfly kiss, as there is a risk of this growing out. She claimed to have already done them, and some had grown out in a month. Suspicious, but ok. I could only afford two, so I scrapped that one for the other two I wanted. No, if I wanted a daith heart, i’d have to pay separately for the heart jewellery. Ok, fine. We didn’t even get on to the septum piercing questions.

This was because, halfway down the form for the daith, I asked if they did numbing. I’m a massive wimp. They said no. Supposedly, Wolverhampton Council don’t issue licences for numbing. So I just said no thanks, and left.

I’d never heard of this before. I know there is little central regulation on piercing in training, and local bye-laws like this was a possibility in my head. The more I thought, however, the less realistic a concept it was.

Especially when I went round to a friend’s flat on the Sunday, who had a new flatmate. Her flatmate is a piercer. She’d never heard of it either.

I went to Twitter. I found Blue Banana. And this happened –


And then, this too –


So that’s an admission that their staff lied. I won’t be going back there for anything. Don’t lie to my face, just tell me the truth. I’m not a fourteen year old who knows nothing, I know more than what is in your 64 page training manual, and I learnt from experience. And now, I know their staff are liars, and your chain has bad customer service.

Also, the same woman said all the ear tunnel and plug sizes went up in twos. Then couldn’t find a 24mm, as they were all 22mm, then 25mm. She should be sacked.


The Pat On The Back

The pat on the back.¬† The action person A gives to person B for good effort or accomplishment, normally¬†given¬†to those peeps who are very¬†hardworking, the effort student.¬† Not¬†the A* student, the effort¬†student.¬† I am that effort student.¬† I work very hard and am always the C student.¬† In the tutor’s¬†eyes anyhow.
For weeks now, I have been working on my portfolio.¬† Some weeks are good, some weeks I think ‘why did you do that?’ or ‘I don’t like that one, take it out’.¬† So for the past few weeks I have been¬†working¬†hard on it, I show it to my tutor and he goes ‘Well, it’s looking much better, isn’t¬†it?’ like I am in Year 3, pats me on the back and goes off to bloody¬†smoke outside!
Whoa, you pat me on the back?¬† That’s it?!!!¬† I want you to say ‘Excellent, very good, a brilliant portfolio!’ not a bloody pat on the back!
On the front, everyone¬†else had got their name, a title¬†underneath the name then ‘textiles designer’ or ‘fashion¬†designer’ under that.¬† Mine is just my¬†name¬†at the moment, because I can’t make my mind up, and u don’t even¬†comment¬†on that?
What is the point, seriously?¬† If you treat me like a Year 3 kid, I will act like it next time.¬† I will have a¬†tantrum, cry, and then i’ll have another pat on the back for ‘It’s all better now’.

Being Pretty Is A Burden? Give Me A Break, Love.

Before anyone starts complaining that i’m being nasty, or a bitch, or whatever, I do believe if you put something out there, ESPECIALLY online, then it’s a free – for – all for the whole world to comment.¬† And these are my thoughts.

Yesterday, it was brought to my attention that someone has been talking utter crap.¬† This woman is called Samantha Brick.¬† She seems to have it in her head that ‘being pretty is a burden’, and though it has opened doors for her, it has also closed some for her too.¬† Now, i’m not going to make this all about her looks like some others have.¬† Yes, she is actually a bit of a munter.¬† But let’s read the content of her Daily Mail article.

Quote : On a recent flight to New York, I was delighted when a stewardess came over and gave me a bottle of champagne.¬† ‚ÄėThis is from the captain ‚ÄĒ he wants to welcome you on board and hopes you have a great flight today,‚Äô she explained.¬† You‚Äôre probably thinking ‚Äėwhat a lovely surprise‚Äô.¬† But while it was lovely, it wasn‚Äôt a surprise. At least, not for me.

Ok then. First, she doesn’t say whether she’s in Standard, Business or First class.¬† I’m kind of inclined to think that this woman was sitting in First, with the fancy seats and televisions and shiny buttons, and that’s just what they do.¬† Plus, who gave the captain the right to give gifts to passengers?¬† Does this get taken out of his wages?¬† Sceptical, me.

She goes on to say that throughout her adult life, she has always received gifts from men just for ‘brightening their day’ with her smile and her face.¬† Didn’t know chivalry was still in fashion.¬† Personally, i’m not a feminist.¬† some of you know that already.¬† We’ll go into that later.¬† But really?¬† She let a man buy her a train ticket, a man in Paris paid for her taxi fare, and bars just tell her not to pay?¬† Oh, no, it’s fine.¬† Your bill is¬†only¬£42 pound (the amount two friends and I spent on a reasonable meal at the start of the week, as an example), but you don’t have to pay, you’re so pretty.¬† Where’s your self worth, woman?¬† If you worked for the money in your pocket, is there not the joy in spending it too?¬† You don’t just take gifts willy – nilly, that just makes you look like a cheapskate.¬† And like you’ll take advantage of any old fool who thinks they can pay their way into bed with you.

Which is another thought.¬† Men, ones that aren’t friends, strangers, only pay for stuff to get you into bed.¬† That’s what i’ve always been told anyway.¬† And, Samantha is a married woman.¬† Now, i’d like a man’s input.¬† If your lady goes out, and lets other men pay for her food / drinks / trains like a freeloader, what are you thinking?¬† You know why these men do it, are you thinking she’s leading them on?¬† even slightly?

I got my other half’s opinion on this.¬† He suggested maybe it looked like she would ‘put out’.¬† Or that the omitted the bit where she ‘then handed over her money, because he wanted to collect some Nectar points’.

Quote : And it is not just jealous wives who have frozen me out of their lives. Insecure female bosses have also barred me from promotions at work.¬† And most poignantly of all, not one girlfriend has ever asked me to be her bridesmaid.¬† You‚Äôd think we women would applaud each other for taking pride in our appearances.¬† I work at mine ‚ÄĒ I don‚Äôt drink or smoke, I work out, even when I don‚Äôt feel like it, and very rarely succumb to chocolate. Unfortunately women find nothing more annoying than someone else being the most attractive girl in a room.

This is why I don’t like women.¬† We’re all bitchy, but some of us have such a big ego that it eclipses the whole fucking sun when it comes out.¬† Most attractive girl in the room?¬† Don’t think much of yourself, do you?

Female bosses, I have heard, are not easy to work with.¬† However, I have only had male bosses, and have experienced sexism problems from them.¬† One on my bosses once completely invented a test for a girl to do, hoping she would fail so she could be sacked as a lighting operative at a gig venue.¬† The same place, same job as I was doing, only before I was employed at the venue.¬† She passed the test, then ended up being employed as a tour lighting director for the Manic Street Preachers.¬† So being barred from promotion just because you boss is female is shite.¬† We are competitive, hell yes we are, but it isn’t JUST US.¬† And, I don’t think women pick their bridesmaids based on their looks.¬† Maybe, Samantha, you’re just not that nice a person?

We all take care of our appearance – we wouldn’t be women if we didn’t.¬† Some people take less care than others, but as base, we all wash our hair, brush it once in a while and probably have a bit of makeup in the bottom of our bag.¬† Smoking and drinking are not a part of taking care over your looks, that’s to do with health, really.¬† And I don’t believe for a second that she ‘rarely succumbs to chocolate’.¬† Unless she doesn’t actually like chocolate, and she forgot to put that in her article.¬† This doesn’t make you an attractive woman.¬† Gillian McKeith probably does the same, and I don’t see men queueing round the block for her!

So, all in all, I think this woman got the wrong end of the stick.¬† She does it regularly, and fucking runs with it.¬† And she probably thinks she’s a fast runner too.

As for the follow up article – this I found to really sum it all up.

The comment which 8,240 users deemed a positive with green arrows was written by Rebs, in Dublin, Ireland. She wrote: ‘We don’t dislike you for thinking you are beautiful, that’s fine. It’s your arrogant deluded attitude that is annoying.’

And, love, should you read this – I am not proving your point.¬† I may think you are ugly, but that doesn’t matter.¬† Your attitude is worse.¬† You are the type of woman that gives the rest of us a bad name.¬† Well done on airing your honest and true opinions (and slightly falsified stories), but the rest of us are entitled to it too.¬† Don’t cry over it.¬† It’s the internet.

Someone bring on rule 34.  And link me to it.  I wanna see the funnies.


P.S. Please read this parody my friend @PrettySDesigns sent me.  Nice.